This is something I've always wanted to try and have always pushed aside, and come up with excuses not to do. Thank you for sharing your experience and your writing. Really beautiful essay!
You should definitely give it a shot! It's really, really liberating. I did it in Northern New Jersey at a local art school, but I'm sure some art schools in brooklyn have open calls for models. They're always in need!
Thank you for the fast response. I live in Princeton, so a Northern New Jersey art school would work for me. Can you tell me the name of the place you posed?
What a fun piece! And, like Jose, I enjoyed the setup you described and the thoughtful aftermath. Many years ago, when I felt myself in danger of becoming too cloistered in my rural life, and my fundamentally introverted nature -- possibly even losing basic social skills -- I set myself the challenge of asking one stranger a day if I could take their picture. It meant I had to get out of the house once a day, talk to people I didn't know (eek!), and ask them to help me out with my project.
People were surprisingly responsive and accommodating, and I finished up the project (maybe I spent a year on it?) with the conviction that 1) it's really important to exercise these social skills; and 2) that the willingness to ask people for help is somehow a fundamental aspect of building community, that too often we insist on an independence that slows us down (why didn't I ask for directions? why didn't I ask for help with the new software?)
Actually, I'm still sorting that out: I *like* being independent; and there are some asks that would definitely make me feel a little defensive... so I'm still figuring out the boundaries.
Congratulations on your publication! It was interesting to me to see how you permitted yourself to be so open/vulnerable, and yet respectful of your own desires and understanding of your own life, and I appreciated the advice your priest gave you; something to think about for sure. Again, congratulations -- here's hoping there are more such bylines in your future!
Anne! What an epic project! You're so, so right: Resisting asking for help DOES slow us down. But sometimes it's the hardest thing to break that "barrier" of independence. Without losing the independence we need. I'm also figuring out those boundaries too. It's weirdly tough because I want to honor my solo-ness but also embrace my social-ness. I'm currently reading "Quiet" by Susan Cain to help navigate my pro-solo style—it might speak to your introverted nature as well.
Can I ask in where you did this photo challenge? It's really, really awesome and I'd love to peek at one of those stranger snapshots. In Buenos Aires, I asked a couple people to take their photo and they were always surprised and then really warm and welcoming. You've inspired me to do more of this. Thank you for reading along and for your byline encouragement.
Tatiana, thanks so much for your interest in my project! It was an enjoyable and instructive thing to do, but it's been at least 10 years since I attempted it, and my memory of where I posted the pictures is a little hazy. Facebook, maybe? (Which I no longer have.) Some of them are still posted in a blog that I've since closed/taken private. I'll send you an invite -- I'd love to hear any reactions you might have. Thanks again!
I’m reading and thinking ‘how dare she do it’? In reality thinking of myself and how I would never have the guts to do it. I enjoyed the use of chronology showing how you got there, the final buildup, and the experience. Congratulations on your published piece! Personal, truthful writing has a way of reaching and relating to others
Okay, I got something, my friend. So when I moved to Kansas, with my now ex-wife, I didn't know anyone. Not a single person. At the same time, I also went back to school to finish my degree, while working a full-time job and being a brand-new dad. It was a lot. For the first four years here, I didn't really know anyone. A few attempts were made here and there, but it all dissipated when some of the supposed Midwest charm turned into apathy or plain discrimination.
Then one day on my way to work I saw a guy wearing a fitted suit riding a pretty cool Vespa with an even cooler helmet down Kansas avenue. That's unusual for Topeka. So, my first thought was, "Who is that guy? I wonder what his story is?" That moment inspired me to start a project where I would talk to other writers or artists and tell their stories, and secretly, I hoped that some of them would become my friends. It worked. I pushed myself to be more extroverted, to reach out to complete strangers and ask for their time. I wasn't comfortable doing that at first, but it got easier with time. I worked on the project for a while. Once my separation and eventual divorce happened, I took a long break. I didn't have the mental capacity to do that during that time. I'm thinking of starting the project once again.
I love this bravery. Of walking up to new people and pushing yourself to open up to them. Thank you for sharing, Israel. I really, really appreciate it—and am inspired by it. I've never fully arrived to a city to live without knowing a soul, and the thought is very daunting. But I'd love to experience this soon....👀
Thanks, Tatiana. I'm humbled that it inspired you. The rewards far outweighed my fears. And from what I know about you by reading your entries, I expect that you'll experience something like that soon.
I entered an art show for the first time in my life. I finally framed (as was required) two of my watercolors. I got 4th place for one of my pieces in my category with an honorable mention. I was so surprised to have been acknowledged, but I was most proud of entering at all. :)
Congrats!! On the recognition and the decision to enter in the first place! 👏 🙌 Do you feel like doing this lit a "fire under you"? I feel like the buzz/pride that comes afterwards can be the biggest fuel for other brazen missions so I'm curious about your POV
Thank you! I drank in the appreciation of my work and it was so so nice to be validated. I'm not all fired up to go into countless art shows, as that's not my focus. But the recongnition calmed some of my insecurities down and allowed me to actually visualize what I want with real belief instead of forced belief.
This is something I've always wanted to try and have always pushed aside, and come up with excuses not to do. Thank you for sharing your experience and your writing. Really beautiful essay!
Thank you so much! Good luck with your own modeling endeavors xx
How brave of you.
I'm a retired academic doing portrait modeling at the Ocean County Artists Guild. I'd like to be brave and try life modeling.
Where in Brooklyn did you pose?
You should definitely give it a shot! It's really, really liberating. I did it in Northern New Jersey at a local art school, but I'm sure some art schools in brooklyn have open calls for models. They're always in need!
Thank you for the fast response. I live in Princeton, so a Northern New Jersey art school would work for me. Can you tell me the name of the place you posed?
T
What a fun piece! And, like Jose, I enjoyed the setup you described and the thoughtful aftermath. Many years ago, when I felt myself in danger of becoming too cloistered in my rural life, and my fundamentally introverted nature -- possibly even losing basic social skills -- I set myself the challenge of asking one stranger a day if I could take their picture. It meant I had to get out of the house once a day, talk to people I didn't know (eek!), and ask them to help me out with my project.
People were surprisingly responsive and accommodating, and I finished up the project (maybe I spent a year on it?) with the conviction that 1) it's really important to exercise these social skills; and 2) that the willingness to ask people for help is somehow a fundamental aspect of building community, that too often we insist on an independence that slows us down (why didn't I ask for directions? why didn't I ask for help with the new software?)
Actually, I'm still sorting that out: I *like* being independent; and there are some asks that would definitely make me feel a little defensive... so I'm still figuring out the boundaries.
Congratulations on your publication! It was interesting to me to see how you permitted yourself to be so open/vulnerable, and yet respectful of your own desires and understanding of your own life, and I appreciated the advice your priest gave you; something to think about for sure. Again, congratulations -- here's hoping there are more such bylines in your future!
Anne! What an epic project! You're so, so right: Resisting asking for help DOES slow us down. But sometimes it's the hardest thing to break that "barrier" of independence. Without losing the independence we need. I'm also figuring out those boundaries too. It's weirdly tough because I want to honor my solo-ness but also embrace my social-ness. I'm currently reading "Quiet" by Susan Cain to help navigate my pro-solo style—it might speak to your introverted nature as well.
Can I ask in where you did this photo challenge? It's really, really awesome and I'd love to peek at one of those stranger snapshots. In Buenos Aires, I asked a couple people to take their photo and they were always surprised and then really warm and welcoming. You've inspired me to do more of this. Thank you for reading along and for your byline encouragement.
Tatiana, thanks so much for your interest in my project! It was an enjoyable and instructive thing to do, but it's been at least 10 years since I attempted it, and my memory of where I posted the pictures is a little hazy. Facebook, maybe? (Which I no longer have.) Some of them are still posted in a blog that I've since closed/taken private. I'll send you an invite -- I'd love to hear any reactions you might have. Thanks again!
Wow just Wow! Congrats!
Thank you so much, Maja ❤️ !
I’m reading and thinking ‘how dare she do it’? In reality thinking of myself and how I would never have the guts to do it. I enjoyed the use of chronology showing how you got there, the final buildup, and the experience. Congratulations on your published piece! Personal, truthful writing has a way of reaching and relating to others
Sometimes being truthful feels scariest of all. Even scarier than literally baring it all. Thank you for all the support. 🧡
P.S. You could have the guts!! (If you wanted to do this, that is haha)
This was really brave of you! I followed along with you as your insecurities melted away and you became one with the room and the artists.
I’ll think about your prompt and get back to you.
Thank you for the kind words, my friend. And please do let me know if anything comes to mind; I'd love to spotlight an Israel win 🧡
Okay, I got something, my friend. So when I moved to Kansas, with my now ex-wife, I didn't know anyone. Not a single person. At the same time, I also went back to school to finish my degree, while working a full-time job and being a brand-new dad. It was a lot. For the first four years here, I didn't really know anyone. A few attempts were made here and there, but it all dissipated when some of the supposed Midwest charm turned into apathy or plain discrimination.
Then one day on my way to work I saw a guy wearing a fitted suit riding a pretty cool Vespa with an even cooler helmet down Kansas avenue. That's unusual for Topeka. So, my first thought was, "Who is that guy? I wonder what his story is?" That moment inspired me to start a project where I would talk to other writers or artists and tell their stories, and secretly, I hoped that some of them would become my friends. It worked. I pushed myself to be more extroverted, to reach out to complete strangers and ask for their time. I wasn't comfortable doing that at first, but it got easier with time. I worked on the project for a while. Once my separation and eventual divorce happened, I took a long break. I didn't have the mental capacity to do that during that time. I'm thinking of starting the project once again.
If you're curious: https://kansasyoung.wordpress.com/
Thanks for letting me share. I can expand if you have more questions.
I love this bravery. Of walking up to new people and pushing yourself to open up to them. Thank you for sharing, Israel. I really, really appreciate it—and am inspired by it. I've never fully arrived to a city to live without knowing a soul, and the thought is very daunting. But I'd love to experience this soon....👀
Thanks, Tatiana. I'm humbled that it inspired you. The rewards far outweighed my fears. And from what I know about you by reading your entries, I expect that you'll experience something like that soon.
Great piece!
I entered an art show for the first time in my life. I finally framed (as was required) two of my watercolors. I got 4th place for one of my pieces in my category with an honorable mention. I was so surprised to have been acknowledged, but I was most proud of entering at all. :)
Congrats!! On the recognition and the decision to enter in the first place! 👏 🙌 Do you feel like doing this lit a "fire under you"? I feel like the buzz/pride that comes afterwards can be the biggest fuel for other brazen missions so I'm curious about your POV
Thank you! I drank in the appreciation of my work and it was so so nice to be validated. I'm not all fired up to go into countless art shows, as that's not my focus. But the recongnition calmed some of my insecurities down and allowed me to actually visualize what I want with real belief instead of forced belief.