So You Arrive to a Foreign City Alone and Desperate for Friends?
Here's what to expect when you know absolutely no one! As demonstrated in these Berlin photo strips.
Tips on Making Friends in a New City—According to My Friends in Berlin That Started Over Themselves
Venture to new places—even if you’re flying solo: “When I moved to Berlin, I went to events, local markets, and cafes on my own.” — Angelina, a sales executive from California that I met by approaching on the street and asking what she was eating.
Start a convo wherever you go: “Most people actually want to talk! Don’t be afraid to start the conversation, otherwise you’re missing a big opportunity to get to know a whole world.” — Steph, a brand manager from Mexico that I met through Angelina.
Tell your network you’re open to friends: “Whenever I told anyone I was going to work from Berlin, I would add that if they knew anyone there, I would love to meet up. Being vocal about that really helped.” — Em, a software engineer from New York City that I met after she responded to my post on Reddit. We also filmed part of a YouTube video together about making friends abroad. Her channel is awesome.
Don’t be afraid of the apps: “BumbleBFF and dating apps are great tools. They’re such easy ways to meet new people.” — Jony, a Dutch psychologist that I met on BumbleBFF.
Don’t put so much pressure on yourself: “Whenever I’m in a new situation, I give myself a two week grace period where I tell myself, ‘This is going to SUCK.’ That way, I don’t get upset when things don’t pan out the way I imagined (just yet).” — Kayla, a designer and my former co-worker that was serendipitously in Berlin a few weeks after I arrived.
(AKA other moments of courage—big and small)
Posting this story: I started taking self-portraits in Berlin’s photoautomats because I wanted to remember how awkward it felt to arrive alone. Once things began to take a turn, I kept taking film photos because I wanted to capture the unexpected joy of starting over. I decided to tell this story using these images because normal me would never share them. Earlier this year, I wrote about how I don’t really like being in front of the camera, so hitting publish on this piece is a full send into vulnerability land.
Showing up solo to Germany: After things went wrong in Spain, I needed a change in my European itinerary. With the help of a friend back in New York, I found a last minute sublet in Berlin, took that as a sign, booked a flight, and started bugging out. I’ve traveled alone for years, but I’ve always felt comfortable in South America because I speak Spanish. Landing in Berlin without speaking German or knowing anyone there had me nervous. The good news? In Germany, everyone spoke better English than me! After the initial loneliness, I ended up having so much fun in Berlin that I didn’t want to leave. I stayed for nearly two months.
Risking rejection—and getting rejected: I’ve never been rejected more than in Berlin. I got ruthlessly rejected by the world’s most exclusive club and by strangers on the street. But pushing myself to put myself out there anyway actually made my time in Germany more freeing and dare I say: exhilarating.
Tatiana Gallardo is an illustrator and freelance brand writer working from around the world. While she’s planning her next trip, she’s still dreaming of the dance floors and her friends back in Berlin.
Loved this!! Thanks for taking a chance on a random off Reddit 🫡✨
Sooo good! Thx for making Berlin what it was <3